How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

NASCAR being considered a sport.

"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

What's funnier than 24? 25

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

What do you call a fat priest? Obese

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

A Great White Shark eats a baby seal's mother. Great White Sharks don't feel remorse.

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...