Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Dude man, I'm high...

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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