You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

Yo Momma So Fat!

Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Nothing. He celebrates Kwanzaa.

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Hispanic was walking down the street, he turned left and was at his house.

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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