Why did the baby die? It got shot.

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

Animal

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

3 strangers were locked in a dark room they turned the light on, unlocked the door and proceeded with their day.

What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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