A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

2 loaves of bread were in a bar they did nothing as they are inanimate objects

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

thumb_up thumb_down +1

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you call a half deaf duck? HEY DUCK!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops