What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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Knock knock

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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Who killed Lincoln Nobody knows

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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