A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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