Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

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Anti pick up line: Boy: If I could re arrange the letters I would put U and I together. Girl: Oh really because if I could rearrange the letters I would put F and U together By Adam Chebali

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

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teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

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a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

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what do you call a professional gamer Their name

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

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your no better than a cockroach

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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