What did the Iraqi Suicide bomber bring on the airplane? His Kindle, he enjoys reading books

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

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Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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