Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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Poker face

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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haha

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops