How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

chuck norris was bit by a snake, a few hours later he died

How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

What did the monkey say to the other monkey Monkey can't talk

how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

darude- sandstorm

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

What is duke oxtoby? legend.

Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas?? -nothing, he didn't make it that far

Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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