I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

pussy enough said

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

A black man without problems.

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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