What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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A hayride would be fun.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

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Yah? Well your a ********

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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