Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

Yah? Well your a ********

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...