What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

You know what's funny? A well told joke

roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

binladin walks into the american seals

Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

You should read the Terms of Service.

What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

[Set up] [No punch line]

So FDR walks into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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