I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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My nipple is bleeding

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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i have cancer

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Yo Mamma

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Politics.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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MLG 420 NO SCOPE THE JEWS

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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