What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

A hayride would be fun.

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because it tastes good.

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...