So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Knock knock, come in.

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my names jim haha

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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