a man walks into a bar and dies

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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my names jim haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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