A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Hi Adam,

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Asian NASCAR.

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What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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BUT HWY?

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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