Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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A black guy gets arrested...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Hi my name is Bob

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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i have cancer

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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my names jim haha

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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