Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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why did the black man drown? he cant swim

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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