What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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I got on a bus, and immediately found that sitting on a bus is boring. I will never climb on top of a bus again.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Poop.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

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I walk into a bar...

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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What does an Ethiopian hula-hoop with? A Cheerios JimBoto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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