What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

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What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

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If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

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Irish sobriety

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

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How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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