knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

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Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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