What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

hy did the boy cross the road? to jump of the bridge on the other side.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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