What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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