What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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4-4-2

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

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Roses are reddish Violets are bluish If it wasn't for Christmas We'd all be Jewish

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Whats worse then a dead baby? 10 dead babies

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who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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Q: How do you win the tour defrance if you have one nut? A: Hard work and dedication.

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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