Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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I went to school. Then I came home.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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