How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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View Terms of Service

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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