- Anti Joke

what's black? a lot of things.

What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

Knock Knock Who is there? bang The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

#IsaiahAfterAD&B

Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

josh sucks polish adams dick

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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