How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than having an ugly face? Having a face like yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man gets shot in the balls by a huge swarm of bees HE IS VERY NICE AND FILLED WITH RICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many baby can u fit in a cup? A: it depends how strong ur blender is How do you get them out? A: tortilla chips

thumb_up thumb_down -19

if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the US. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops