A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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