I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

Two families of pedophiles go to the beach. One of the dads lays down to suntan and looks at the other dad. "Hey! Get out of my son!" he exclaims.

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

How many armless people does it take to change a lightbulb? I dunno, that's why I asked you... Hello?

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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