Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

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What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

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4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

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Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

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What a wonderful life!!! *gunshot*

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Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops