Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

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Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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Pikachu walked into a bar. "GO, SQUIRTLE!" the bartender screamed. An epic Pokémon battle ensued, after they got drunk. The end. Pika pi!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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