Cancer

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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What is black and looks like a person A black person

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

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PSP its a nut you can play... Outside...

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops