Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

knock knock no no you go now i clean

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops