Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

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your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

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ok

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops