what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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No!

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What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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Knock knock! Who's there? IT DOESN'T MATTER, YOU'RE NOT COMING TO MY HOUSE!!!! *closes door*

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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