Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

So there's this white guy with a huge dick.

just in time?

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

what do you call a monkey? a monkey

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

A baby seal walks into a club.

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

What do an elephant, and a banana have in common? Neither one is an ambulance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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