Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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The economy.

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Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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