Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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123457

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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You're on fire.

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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