What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +24

why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +22

God is like semen. They're both nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Boys have swag, real men have class

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops