*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

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Why are watermelons green? 9, because cows like to eat grass.

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What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

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wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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Sex

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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YOLO

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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