Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

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Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

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Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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How many christians does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows, by the time they finish unscrewing the burned out light, a hi-jacked plane crashes into them.

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why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

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24

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

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What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops