Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

they're dead. idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So, this joke isn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a horse and a chicken? They're different species and also the chicken is female, while the horse I was referring to is male.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops