Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

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A: "How much rope does it take to hang a baby?" B: "I don't know, how much?" A: "The guy at Home Depot didn't know either."

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Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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