What is 33 + 1? Penis

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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For no reason at all Pac-man was being chased by evil monsters while eating his luch...He choked on his food and died

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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White men's rights

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What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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National security?

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A: "How much rope does it take to hang a baby?" B: "I don't know, how much?" A: "The guy at Home Depot didn't know either."

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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