Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you end a sentence

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock Come in! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the man die? He was old.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops