So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Cheese and toast

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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That awkward moment when Amish mingle has a member

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What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

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Q: A blonde walks into a bar. What does she get? A: An icepack.

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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