What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

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Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

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Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

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Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

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What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

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GONNA

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A guy walks into a grocery store. He asks a lady where the potatoes are. She says on isle 5 He goes to isle 5, but there are no potatoes.

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A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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